Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

How to help you grow.


Growing, changing, learning, discovering--all some of my favorite things. It's the process that I love, rather than the final destination. In the middle of things, I usually find myself wishing for something more straightforward, more cut-and-dried, longing for some concrete, step-by-step instructions to just figure it out already! Yet, in the end, that isn't what satisfies me because that isn't what makes me grow. That isn't what makes the lessons part of who I am.

I've learned this about myself over the course of the past few years. And I love seeing that same process in other people. The problem: I'm not very good at letting that process happen in other people, especially those closest to me.

So often, I see someone struggling with something so similar to what I've dealt with in the past. I want so badly for them to come to the same understanding that I have--lessons in grace, thankfulness, joy, perseverance...whatever it may be. Unfortunately, I tend to lay it out for them as a step-by-step plan of action (or try to condense all of the details and connections and everything that made my experience meaningful into a little bite-sized speech that loses its significance). I forget that God doesn't work inside a box. He doesn't work the same way in every person. The lessons might ultimately be the same, but the process by which they're learned is unique to each person.

God is personal. He's relational, and that's how He teaches us. The way He communicates with my best friend or my boyfriend or my little brother might be completely unrecognizable to me at first glance...

...and that's a good thing.


It's such proof of how well God knows each of us, not just on a surface level but deeply. He knows how our minds work, He knows our hearts, and He knows exactly what makes us tick. He gets me enough to know to communicate with me through books and lyrics and falling leaves. He knows the jumps my mind makes to connect seemingly unrelated ideas into something so profound.

He knows I'll get it.

If He can do that for me on such a deeply personal level, won't He do the same for everyone else, communicating with them in ways that I might not understand?

The thing is, I understand the concept mentally. I get it. And that leaves me here: how do I live like I get it? How does it look in real life? Because that's what I want to do, both with my life and in my relationships.

I want to be able to foster that kind of growth in other people without resorting to giving unnecessary advice and telling them what they need to do.* I want to help other people discover the answers for themselves, because really, that's what it's all about anyway. That's how we grow, and I want to help people grow. I want to be able to step back and let God do His thing and not get in the way. Still, there's a place for human influence. Where's the balance between sitting back and doing nothing and going too far?

I don't know.
I don't have the answers this time.

This is one of those posts I can't wrap up nice and neat, because I'm still trying to figure it out myself. So I'm asking--have you ever wrestled with this before? I know that the answer varies from situation to situation, but what have some of your experiences been?**

And, I don't know. Maybe this is one of those things that can't ever really be answered, because it can't be put into a box. Maybe there isn't an answer. Maybe it just has to be lived and figured out along the way, different for every single situation. And maybe I need to be okay with that.

*I definitely think advice has its place, but right now, I need to learn not to give it. I have a tendency to think I have the answers, when in reality, I don't at all.
**Think about this in terms of personal relationships, like friendships or marriage or even children, on a spiritual level. That's where I struggle most. How do you help someone grow spiritually without trying to give them all the answers?

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Trust and obey.

Listening to: "Light Up The Sky" by The Afters
(It's amazing to me how God can use a simple song to be so comforting. This song has made it to the top of my iTunes most played list within the past couple of days. It's a good one.)

"There is no ongoing spiritual life without this process of letting go. At the precise point where we refuse, growth stops. If we hold tightly to anything given to us, unwilling to let it go when the time comes to let it go or unwilling to allow it to be used as the Giver means it to be used, we stunt the growth of the soul."

- Elisabeth Elliot

Trust.
It seems to be the number one recurring theme in my life, a lesson I'm constantly learning in various degrees, in a variety of ways.

Sometimes it's exciting.
Sometimes it's scary.
Sometimes it's painful.

And then there are the times when it becomes so frightening and excruciating that you feel like you can't survive, when understanding is nonexistent, and you feel as if God has completely blindsided you for no particular reason.

Now is one of those times.

I never expected to be here, but since when does God work within my expectations? If there was any other way, I would have chosen it, but in this case, God gave me no other option. Once again, I had to come to terms with the fact that I have to trust Him and obey whatever He tells me, even when it hurts. Even when doesn't make sense. I have no idea what's coming next. I've never been very good at predicting the future (case in point) but I always seem to try anyway. This time, though? The only thing I can do is take life one step at a time, because everything is completely out of my hands at this point. All I can do is trust. And, somehow, that has to be okay.


"You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what He has promised."
- Hebrews 10:36

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Life, love, & design.

Listening to: "Waking Up" by Olin & the Moon
(I love websites like NoiseTrade and Brite Revolution. So much great, free music to be discovered. I've found some of my now-favorite songs through them. Definitely something to check out! This song in particular is one of those chill, rainy day-type songs. For whatever reason, songs like that tend to be my favorites. Anyway. Get it on Brite Revolution.)

Hello again! I think it's time for a real update. There are so many things spinning around in my head at the moment, but I think most of them can be classified under one of three things, hence the title of this post.

Life
First: A quick breakdown on what's going on with me. Overall, life is good. However, I've decided that spring semesters just aren't as good as fall semesters (though much less dramatic, which I am perfectly okay with). Oh well. Currently...
  • Spring break! Yay! After changing plans 85 times, I decided to come home until Wednesday night. Mike's going to pick me up in Atlanta and after he gets off work on Thursday, we're heading to Kentucky to see his parents for a day. I'm actually kinda excited about that.
  • Ridiculous reviews on Amazon. Today, I discovered this gem of a review for Mae's (a)fternoon EP:
"This is music. If you like music, buy this. This is not a box of croutons. If you want croutons you are looking in the wrong place. In Pieces is a good song. Better than Prince, or anything from the 80's. If you are from the 90's you would probably rather listen to croutons shaking around than 80's music. If that's the case, buy this Mae album or a box of croutons, but not 80's songs."
Ummm...what?! Hahaha! People are so ridiculous.
  • Advance Class Selection. Oh my gosh. To think that I'm registering for classes for my senior year of college is mind-boggling. How on EARTH am I this old?* 27 hours to go, and only 9 of those consist of required classes. Hello, fun electives!

Love
Two things: 1) relationships are hard and 2) I don't love other people anywhere near as much as I should. Both have been bothering me lately.

First of all, relationships. The give-and-take side of love can be a hard thing, I'm finding, but at the same time, I wouldn't give it up for anything. My biggest problem right now? Dealing with all the petty criticism from other people. I never thought I'd say this, but it's making graduation look sweeter every day.

Photo Cred: Julian Bialowas
Second, I've been reading this book called Amazing Grace by Jonathan Kozol for my Child Development class, and I can't stop thinking about it. It focuses on the lives of children growing up in the South Bronx district of NYC, and while I do think the book has a bit of a political agenda and possibly overstates a few things, I also think it contains a good deal of truth. And that truth is slightly heartbreaking. I guess I just don't understand why we (myself included) feel that we have the right to treat certain people worse than others, simply based on social standing, be it economic status or popularity. We're all human. We all have hearts that can love and hurt with equal depth. We all have hopes and fears for the future. It's cliché to say, but underneath all of our differences, we're so similar. So some of us make bad decisions. Who doesn't? It's like no one cares to look a little deeper to try and understand the reasons behind the undesirable things we see in others, yet we're so resentful of those who judge us on a surface level. Why do we expect something from others that we aren't even willing to live up to ourselves? The book also has me thinking a lot about what I want to do with my life--and what I'm currently doing. I'm not completely sure what, specifically, I'm planning to do, but I do know that I want to make it a point in both my career and my everyday life to love the people that the rest of the world seems to deem "unlovable," no matter what. That I am sure of.

Design
Anyway, switching gears: I have been so obsessed with design-related stuff lately. Not that this is anything new, really--I'm always up for some good design. But I'll also go through phases where I seriously cannot get enough of it and now is one of those times. Blogs, magazines, anything. I love it.

Pro: It gets me thinking about creative ideas to implement later (i.e. future home, designs for my future freelance design business--or maybe just design classes, but hey, I can dream--or, you know, just whatever).
Con: I have to wait to implement them.

Anyway, here are a few things I've been liking lately:

Julian Bialowas' 365Q Photos
Seriously gorgeous-yet-simple photography/typography, and I like the quotes, too. After seeing these pictures, I kinda want to visit Alberta, Canada. You'll probably be seeing some of these show up in future posts (one of which can be seen above).

It's a fairly new online magazine devoted to design of all types (especially interior). There's some really great stuff to be found! I mean, seriously, I even like the ads. Since it's an online magazine, if you see something you like, you can usually click on it for a direct link to buy. Pretty cool! As far as particular favorites, I'm kinda liking the modern-rustic design in the Brooke Giannetti article on page 37 of the latest issue. Seems like a good combination for me.

I just like things. Like these:


So! That's my life lately. Hopefully, I won't go so long between "real" updates next time, but with me, you never can tell. Until then, I hope things are going awesomely for the rest of you!

*No, I don't actually think 20 is "old," but I do think that it's old for me. How can I possibly already be an "adult"?! What the heck, life? Stop going by so fast!
**Ahem. In case you didn't pick up on this, every word in that subtitle is a link to a different design-related blog. Enjoy!

Thursday, December 10, 2009

"I'll be found in You...still standing."

"I am changing, less and less asleep.
Made of different stuff than when I began."

- "Shadowfeet" by Brooke Fraser
I feel like that one quote sums up this year for me (if that's even possible).* I can't even explain it completely—it just is what it is. This year...I don't even know how to describe it. I have never learned so much within a single span of twelve months in my entire life. It has, by far, been one of the hardest years of my life, yet I can't call it bad. It has changed me so much. I am definitely not the same person I was a year ago, but in a good way. I'm wiser, more mature, and more aware of myself, others, and life in general. My relationship with God is different, too. It's closer and based on more trust than ever before. It's amazing, really.

One running theme throughout this year has definitely been adventure. Not just in the normal sense (though with a trip to Utah and Arizona, hiking, whitewater rafting, camping, and everything else, there was plenty of that, too!), but just life in general. Completely new experiences; never knowing what's coming next; scary, yet fun; never easy, but always rewarding...yeah, that's this year for sure. I've had to trust God like never before. For the first time in my life, I can honestly say that I trust Him 100%, no question. I've always trusted Him, but this year has brought about a new element of it that I've never had before.

I've cried more this year than I can remember doing in a long time, but I've also laughed more than ever. I lost a good friend for the first time, but I also gained so many amazing new ones. I had to make decisions that I've never had to make before, but through that, God reassured me more than ever. I guess there have been a lot of extremes. It's funny how it all balances out somehow.**
"When the world has fallen out from under me,
I'll be found in You, still standing.
When the sky rolls up and mountains fall on their knees,
When time and space are through, I'll be found in You."

* I love finding songs that describe my life to me. It always gives me chills (and usually results in some pretty obsessive listening...). I have to say, I think the craziest one was when I heard "Lonely Tonight" by Matt Wertz last month (see my post from November 3). Everything, down to the exact month and length of time. So weird.
** There you have it--my standard, super-reflective, end-of-the-year post. I can't help it; I try really hard to not go overboard, but I have to be introspective on here sometimes. :)

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

"The eve of an ending..."

Lonely Tonight
Matt Wertz

6th and Green is a warm place in November
When the air is cold and the leaves blow on the ground
And I don't think that I can even remember
Why it was that I came to this town

'Cause I just want to be lonely tonight
Just me and my Maker in this cold moonlight

This is me on the eve of an ending
To what I've known's been constant for a year
And I'm so scared of this pain that I'll be sending
Sometimes I just want to run away in fear

But I just want to be lonely tonight
Just me and my Maker in this cold moonlight

No, I haven't heard your voice in two weeks now
And anticipation's been wearing me thin
And I just can't help but wonderin', baby, if somehow
We could tear these pages out and begin again

Because I just want to be lonely tonight
Just me and my Maker in this cold moonlight
I just want to be lonely tonight
With no one around to see the sight
Of me lying here

'Cause this is the hardest thing I've ever done before
I said, this is the hardest thing I've ever done before
And I don't want to be lonely

But I won't be lonely tonight
Because my Maker's holding me

Friday, October 16, 2009

Lesson of the Year: Abbreviated

“Even if your hands are shaking
And your faith is broken
Even as your eyes are closing
Do it with a heart wide open
Say what you need to say.
- “Say” by John Mayer
Cliché as it seems, it has been, by far, the number one lesson of my year.
(I'm feeling at tad contemplative at the moment...)

Monday, August 3, 2009

Um.

I logged onto Myspace a few minutes ago, just for the heck of it. I don't know why I still check it--I never get anything new on there anymore. This time, however, I had both a new friend request and a new message. Friend request was irrelevant. The message... Um. See for yourself:
Subject: Because breaking up is hard to do...
Message:after a "rigorously" brief overview of your profile, I jsut wanted to let you know that I've already married and divorced you in my mind..thanks for all the wonderful imaginary memories, you will always have a special place in my heart :)

your ex hubby
moe

ps, you can have the dog and I will take the house in hawaii :)
pps, if you don't laugh, then its not funny, lol.

Umm.. Thank you? I've never seen this guy before in my life. Apparently, my profile re-publicized itself after I set it to private (this has since been fixed). But really, this guy needs to work on his pickup technique. A few points he should have considered:

#1: The obvious: It's MYSPACE. Enough said.

#2: Punctuation and capitalization are valuable.

#3: You don't know me, nor do you have any connection to me whatsoever. This, added with point #1, is kind of a major deal-breaker. It also adds to your creeper factor by a lot.

#4: If you are trying to hit on a girl, why would you tell her that you've divorced her in your mind already? That really gives her hope for the longevity of the potential relationship, don't you think?

#5: I better be getting a whole lot more than just the dog.

This gives me an idea: I should write a book for guys on how to go about their relationships with girls! I mean, I have plenty of real-life examples to use. I think it would have the potential to be a bestseller.

P.S. I found new music! Ever heard of Blake Aaron Guthrie? He's kind of like a Matt Wertz/Dave Barnes mix. I found him while randomly clicking around on NoiseTrade (I love that site). You can get his Love in Different Lights EP on there for free. Just FYI. :)